Great! Now I Want a Gun!

I don’t own a gun. I have nothing against them, and have had the chance to fire them on rare occasions and have greatly enjoyed the experience. It’s like the idea of defusing a bomb that I saw in some cheezy movie, where the bomb-maker (maybe the movie with Tommy Lee Jones as the Irish bomb maker?), poses the theory that the bomb is the potential of this great release of energy and the person who diffuses it is cheating the world out of that release of energy. You could even take that theory further and say that the reason the person made the bomb in the first place, is the result of the iniquities of the world and is necessary to release that negative energy, blah blah blah…bullshit, bullshit, bullshit…I’m off on a tangent again.

Here’s a better quote that hits closer to the center mass of the target sheet; “I’d rather have a gun and not need it, than need one and not have it.” I’m no crazy conspiracy theorist, and I don’t think the gov’ment is out to “pry my gun from my cold dead hand,” but there is something to be said for being prepared. I’m sure every person on the side of the gun issue, and especially in the wake of the Newtown Shooting incident, has pondered where they stand. On the far left, we ask to basically get rid of all guns or at least make it so difficult to get one, that you discourage the casual enthusiast. On the other end of the spectrum, everyone should have a fucking arsenal in their basement for when Obama comes to make us gay marry and sign up for the Death Panel with his Rasta Army. 

Unfortunately, I fall into the greater majority in between those two absolutes. I’m definitely left of center, pro-choice, pro-legalization and fiscally conservative (let’s cut Congress’ pay, the defense budget, and pump that money into Education and the Infrastructure and get off the gas), but I want a gun. Why? Because at the end of the day, when I lay my head down to rest in my nice comfy bed, I think, “what would you do if someone broke into your house right now, where your children sleep, and they had a gun?” What would I do? I’d like to think I would fight the good fight and be able to disarm them and save the day; be the hero, but I think I would probably end up dead at worst, or robbed and sobbing to a police officer and feeling far less of the man and veteran I am. So I now want a gun to defend my home and children just in case, and will die happy if the thing is never fired at anything other than a paper target.

Now, I don’t want any assault weapons or fancy-schmancy tech 9 with the night vision goggles, just a pump shot gun or an automatic pistol with enough rounds and training to dissuade an intruder from doing anything stupid. And yes, I totally get it that you are far more likely to get shot accidentally in your own home by a family member than you would be by the boogeyman intruder I’m defending myself from, but I don’t care. I still have to think that I’d be safer having one and not needing it than not having and needing one.


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